Q: My partner of five years and I are planning a wedding for next year. My one problem: Whenever we have a conflict, he goes insane. He calls me names, revisits the past, belittles me. It lasts days. He then twists the story, is defensive and blames me for any problems. I’m worried about the future when there are more responsibilities and kids in the marriage. A: Cancel the wedding date. Then separate for at least a period of months while he attends anger management counselling. If he doesn’t learn to be able to discuss issues and make compromises, you’d be taking a risk to marry. YOU MIGHT BE INTERESTED IN... His current outbursts and treatment are abusive emotionally, and harmful to your mental health. He’d be a danger to you and any children, if he remains this volatile and nasty. See Below. Q: I’m trying to understand my recent, extremely cold, angry reaction to my husband’s latest temper outburst. Previously, when … [Read more...] about My partner has anger issues that last for days: Ask Ellie
Imagine: It’s Thanksgiving Monday. LCBO stores are closed. And you forgot to grab the wine for the big feast. It could happen. And if it does, I’ve got you covered. Here’s what you do. Head to that other store that sells wine in Ontario—The Wine Rack. Grab any of these bottles that are entirely drinkable. No, none of them are total show stoppers. The Wine Rack doesn’t have many of those in my humble opinion. But here are four of the best bottles they stock. And 160 locations pepper the province, so there’s probably one near you. The first three lovelies in this listicle go well with a traditional roast turkey feast as well as other such mains as ham, a lentil loaf, or leg of lamb. And the icewine that follows is best drizzled over scoops of crushed ice for a fun finale. Here’s to hoping these bottles don’t sell out too quickly. 2018 Jackson-Triggs Niagara Estate Reserve Sauvignon Blanc, VQA Niagara Peninsula, ON ($14.25) For less than … [Read more...] about LCBO closed? Here’s what’s good at The Wine Rack
By Yvette Van Veen Special to the Star Wed., May 15, 2019 Q: This will be our dog’s first summer. How do we best prepare him for the bustle of the summer season? More importantly, how do we prepare him for fireworks on the long weekend? Should we take him to an event so he can get used to them? A: Socialization is critical for all dogs. Well-socialized dogs feel safe in the world. They can cope with all that life throws their way. This would include noisy and crowded environments such as the summer festivals. When it comes to fireworks, the short answer is no, you shouldn’t take a dog to a show as a means of socializing them to the noise. Each year, after Victoria Day, lamp posts are covered with posters of lost dogs. Many of these dogs bolted when frightened by fireworks. While some people may insist that they take dogs to events with no ill effect, it’s a very high-risk strategy with potentially tragic consequences. The issue with risky … [Read more...] about How do we prepare our dog for fireworks on the long weekend?
By Carola Vyhnak Special to the Star Tues., May 14, 2019 Neal Mortensen has a downtown “piggy bank” — as he calls it — holding onto his retirement funds until he gives up his Newmarket dentistry practice in a decade or so. It’s a pair of rental condos he invested in when the neighbourhood of Liberty Village was getting off the ground. His piggy bank is growing plumper from the appreciation of the properties and the $350 a month in rental income he clears after paying all expenses, fees and mortgage interest. “This is kind of like a pension plan and an insurance policy as well,” explains Mortensen, who’s in his early 50s. Renting out an investment property or part of your own home in Toronto can pay off for both landlords and tenants with all signs pointing to a prolonged rental housing shortage and growth in real estate values. Article Continued Below In Mortensen’s case, the two-bedroom unit and … [Read more...] about Why an investment property is a long game, not a quick flip
By Kate Carraway Special to the Star Mon., May 13, 2019 My husband, who works in the relatively stiff realm of finance, recently forwarded me an email chain between himself and some colleagues. Their messages were short, specific, and direct. No one apologized for anything. This was an email chain without any paragraphs, with only one exclamation mark, following the terminal “Thanks” (!), and without any… emotions. I loved it. It’s not often you get to wander into a magical reality so completely different than your own, and even less often that the experience comes in the form of an email you originally mistook for something sent directly, intentionally, to you. As a person in a creative field dominated by women — and as an overshare-y, feelings-y person, who communicates with and on a probably too-high frequency— my emails, are a meadow of adjectives and exclamations, with bowers of all-caps, and the occasional emoji … [Read more...] about What should we do about email?